Fuck! This is going to be a long one. It's going to be a long one or I might explode!
Please don't be overwhelmed.
I want to remind you that it is not my goal to get a response. Even if you want to respond, you don't need to write a big email. You can just comment on posts here.
I think part of what I'm doing is telling you about my day and what's on my mind, stuff I'd be doing if we had more frequent contact. And I'd be asking you
about your day too, of course, but I can't do either. Maybe this can serve as a proxy.
“I want To do with you what spring does with the cherry trees.” ― Pablo Neruda
“If you want what's in the package you should at least know how to get the string off, is what I say.”
― Margaret Atwood
“I could feel the day offering itself to me, and I wanted nothing more than to be in the moment-but which moment? Not that one, or that one, or that one,” ― Billy Collins,
“Sometimes it is the smallest thing that saves us: the weather growing cold, a child's smile, and a cup of excellent coffee.” ― Jonathan Carroll
I know you understand this feeling. So many things I'm tired of. I do know they will resolve. I know the work I am doing will help make things happen and I just need diligence and patience. I'm doing most of the right things, and oh, it is so much fucking better, but, yes, I'm tired.
And it's bizarre how I can have a fairly optimistic outlook, that I know things can and will be amazing, and that I am generally a happy person. And at the same time, that happiness exists the deep depression mills around under the surface, a combination of old sludge and current stresses.
“Death's got an Invisibility Cloak?" Harry interrupted again.
"So he can sneak up on people," said Ron. "Sometimes he gets bored of running at them, flapping his arms and shrieking...”
― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
You probably don't want to mess with this mermaid on a good day. She's been trained by battling the worst ones! -Lorelei Moon
- I want desperately to move, but I have to wait until I get my settlement this summer.
- I'm tired of not having another musician and/or an instrument to write with and I miss performing.
- And frankly, even though I am not ready to live with a lover, I find it ridiculous that I am sleeping alone so much of the time.
- I have also come to the realization that unless I can find an off street place to park it, I may have to sell my car. It is going to add all kinds of penalties via the DMV and may risk my SSI case. I'm not sure why, but I am not supposed to have any changes in property or status while my case is ongoing. I won't get much for it, but I don't think I can hold out until this summer when i have the money.
“If you're looking for sympathy you'll find it between shit and syphilis in the dictionary.”
― David Sedaris
“Sometimes the whole world is mud luscious and puddle wonderful” ― Thomas M. Disch
“We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out.” ― Ray Bradbury
Like you, I enjoy walking slow, slower still when I have my camera, and I love to change up my route. There's always something interesting to see in the hood! Today I found, CHICKENS! They were so curious and sociable! All rushing over to the one spot in the fence through which they could be seen to see who I was! You can experience a bit of my walk home with the slide show below.
Oh, I'm sorry, Josh, my darling. Are you feeling cheated? Where's the cheesecake you say? The stuff you can't look at on your work computer? After, all that's why you were scrolling past all the chatter & the chicken pictures, right?
“I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it.” ― Mae West
I wish I didn't have to wait until Wednesday to have you in my bed!