Blog Archives

Trying To Breathe

4/26/2017

YES! Queen of Katwe is on Netflix now. I missed it in the theaters.
Also, Secret Life of Pets, my favorite Happy Place cartoon!
Oh Queen of Katwe was soooo good! I always know a film will be wonderful with Mira Nair at the helm! The whole cast is perfection!

Just under 2 blocks walk to my walk to my car wore me out and of course, caused a coughing fit, but I got to my therapy appointment EARLY and managed not to cough through the whole thing. Progress!
Now to go pick up a prescription and buy soup!

Stay tuned for reason #572 why my new therapist is awesome sauce!

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Sick & Miserable but Getting By With A Little Help From My Friends

4/23/2017

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I NEED THE DRUGS!

Trying to sort things out and come up with a plan for the next few days. I am literally so sick of being sick. That stupid prescription cough syrup is worthless! Even though I was really sleepy I was up all night coughing instead. Then I finally fell asleep late morning and slept all day!

I wish I could just relax and let my body do what it needs to without worrying about how I'm going to cover food and medicine or how much I've spent already. I'm officially out of the OTC stuff that was helping. I'm almost out of food.

I desperately want to take a real shower but I'm so dizzy that I've had several close calls where I'd have fallen for sure if I hadn't had something to grab onto! My neuropathy is flaring. My poor joints and muscles ache because they want to exercise but all I can manage is gentle stretching. I haven't been this sick for a long time that's for sure!

THREE DAMN WEEKS!

I have a tiny bit of money and I am trying to figure out how to use it in the most effective way. I'm also afraid that I won't be well enough by Wednesday to do my dog walk which will mean I flat out have no grocery money for the rest of the month. Having to worry about stuff like this sure can't be helping me get better!

I was thinking I would just take what I have and go to the store tomorrow, get the smallest box of Mucinex DM I could find and spend whatever I have left on cans of soup. But being so dizzy, I don't feel safe driving so now I'm thinking it might be more practical to stay home and have a couple large Chinese soups delivered. That helped so much last week and I got about 5 days worth of food.

Update: A kind friend ordered my meds through Amazon so now I just have to worry about food!

SCIENCE!!!

Well, the cats are happier now. Fed, watered and scooped. And I just had a meal brought to me by SCIENCE! And I say, all hail the mighty preservatives.

I stopped buying Trader Joe's bagels because they would mold way too quickly, supposedly because they don't use preservatives. I bought some Sara Lee bagels a couple weeks ago but I've been so sick I haven't wanted bread.

Today I woke up craving bread so I pulled out the bag, dreading green bread, and they were ok! Now I'm happily chewing on a buttery multigrain bagel and sipping green tea. And I can even taste it just a little! Huzzah!

Today's science lesson: All preservatives aren't bad. Sara Lee uses Calcium Propionate which is a calcium salt. If you were to consume large quantities of it, yes it's toxic, but the amount used in baked goods just keeps mold and bacteria at bay.

And here is where the difference between SCIENCE and pseudoscience propaganda looms large! Because they will tell you all preservatives are bad while science overwhelmingly tells us that preservatives in bread have saved lives. Part of the reasons people are anti vaccine is because they don't remember what life was like living with these horrible diseases. Well, few of us remember how many people died from moldy or bacterial contaminated bread!

CATS

Only Buj Buj knows why she is yelling at me right now.

She's been fed; chicken and lobster, no less. She's even had a cuddle. How can such a plush beast with such a cute little face make so much noise? Damn Siamese ancestry!

Buj Buj is actually Burmese and they are generally much quieter but I guess she didn't get the memo. She starts blaring and it's like a cross between Bette Davis and an air raid siren. I am not exaggerating!

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Sick, But Friends To The Rescue!

4/23/2017

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When People Can Send Me Drugs Via Amazon.....

Trying to sort things out and come up with a plan for the next few days. I am literally so sick of being sick. That stupid prescription cough syrup is worthless! Even though I was really sleepy I was up all night coughing instead. Then I finally fell asleep late morning and slept all day!

I wish I could just relax and let my body do what it needs to without worrying about how I'm going to cover food and medicine or how much I've spent already. I'm officially out of the OTC stuff that was helping. I'm almost out of food.

I desperately want to take a real shower but I'm so dizzy that I've had several close calls where I'd have fallen for sure if I hadn't had something to grab onto! My neuropathy is flaring. My poor joints and muscles ache because they want to exercise but all I can manage is gentle stretching. I haven't been this sick for a long time that's for sure! Three damn weeks!
Waah!

I have a tiny bit of money and I am trying to figure out how to use it in the most effective way. I'm also afraid that I won't be well enough by Wednesday to do my dog walk which will mean I flat out have no grocery money for the rest of the month. Having to worry about stuff like this sure can't be helping me get better!

I was thinking I would just take what I have and go to the store tomorrow, get the smallest box of Mucinex DM I could find and spend whatever I have left on cans of soup. But being so dizzy, I don't feel safe driving so now I'm thinking it might be more practical to stay home and have a couple large Chinese soups delivered. That helped so much last week and I got about 5 days worth of food.

Update: A kind friend (ND) ordered my meds through Amazon so now I just have to worry about food!

6pm

Hooray! Thank you for buying my meds! Now I can use the little bit of $cratch I have for food.

722PM

Well, the cats are happier now. Fed, watered and scooped. And I just had a meal brought to me by SCIENCE! And I say, all hail the mighty preservatives.

I stopped buying Trader Joe's bagels because they would mold way too quickly, supposedly because they don't use preservatives. I bought some Sara Lee bagels a couple weeks ago but I've been so sick I haven't wanted bread.

Today I woke up craving bread, so I pulled out the bag, dreading green bread, but they were ok! Now I'm happily chewing on a buttery, multigrain bagel and sipping green tea. I can even taste it just a little! Huzzah!

Today's science lesson: All preservatives aren't bad. Sara Lee uses Calcium propionate, which is a calcium salt. If you were to consume large quantities of it, yes it's toxic, but the amount used in baked goods just keeps mold and bacteria at bay.

And here is where the difference between SCIENCE and pseudoscience propaganda looms large! Because they will tell you all preservatives are bad, while science overwhelmingly tells us that preservatives in bread have saved lives. Part of the reasons people are anti vaccine is because they don't remember what life was like living with these horrible diseases. Well, few of us remember how many people died from moldy or bacterial contaminated bread!

Dear Past Lorelei: You can stay on your soapbox.
People get even dumber!

736pm

Only Buj Buj knows why she is yelling at me right now.

She's been fed, chicken and lobster in a can, no less. She's even had a cuddle. How can such a plush little beastie, with such a cute little face make so much noise? Damn Siamese ancestry!

Buj Buj is actually Burmese and they are generally much quieter, but I guess she didn't get the memo. She starts blaring and it's like a cross between Bette Davis and an air raid siren. I am not exaggerating!

Dear Past Lorelei: We miss that loud fuzzball

1246 AM
By special request (By Me): Cheesy Pasta with meatballs a la Trader Joe's: onion, yellow squash, eggplant and mushrooms.
#theinsomniacskitchen #morebetterpopeoplecooking
#thingsimadeyouwishyouate #pastacoma #cheeseplease

Future Lorelei wants that NOW, Dammit!

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Sick Day: Netflix and Weird Dreams

4/22/2017

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DOCTOR'S ORDERS

Well, my doc said bed rest. I just slept for 13 hours. Does that count?
Also, Thrilled so many friends got out and about for SCIENCE today!
Wanted to march for science but also want to stay out of the hospital.

WHAT'S ON TV?

Netflix while sick. Shetland is so very good! Ingobernable is addictive! Ooh and Bill Nye is just taking on EVERYTHING! Hunter Pence guest spot for the win!

That moment when you wake up and your lungs are blissfully calm ...
UNTIL
you sit up and cough for ten fecking minutes! Waah.

FEVER DREAMS

Sick dreams always come with extra weirdness. Sleeping more than half a day gives you time for a lot of them! I had several dreams about moving or looking for housing which is a typical anxiety dream for me, as you might guess.

In one, I was going to move to Walnut Creek (only in a dream) because I found a place with miraculously low rent. Also, in dream, Walnut Creek had snow and bears!

The lady actually had two apartments, a studio and a one bedroom. The studio wasn't for rent except the landlady mentioned the person moving out of the other apartment might come back to use the studio as an art studio. She had been really close to the guy who used to rent it but he passed away. The one bedroom was really cute so I agreed on a move in date.

When I came to move in though, the woman had decided not to move out of the one bedroom but no one had told me. I could rent the studio but it didn't have a stove and it wasn't ready. The old tenant's stuff was still there and on top of everything else, turns out he had committed suicide in there. The room was tiny, dark, felt awful. There was a mottled green shag carpet that needed to be pulled because it had been "soiled" when he died.

He has this amazing, Bosch like collage that took up one entire wall with a huge Illuminati eye in the center and he had Tiki stuff all over. It was an odd conglomeration. Needless to say, I decided to go back and renegotiate with my current landlord (in the dream) to keep my place.

It was Christmas, so my friends and I decided to go shopping. There was this huge escalator tram thing that went up to all the stores because this was dream Walnut Creek. So we got on and at our stop the Tram lady let everyone out then told me I had to squeeze out some tiny kids door and when I couldn't, she laughed and fat shamed me.

I remember one other dream where me and my friend Steven were hunting for something. I think it was a big crystal. We went into a cave and just as we found it, this little Gollum type person with long raggedy hair came and snatched it then went through this trick door at the back of the cave. We figured out how to work the door and went after!

As we got deeper in the cave it was like someone had created all these fake sets. There was an icy cavern made of foam core, cardboard rocks, etc. We still hadn't found our crystal or the crazy creature that took it. We finally got down into a more open area and there were rows of stone huts along the back wall, except they were made of cardboard. We each took a side. Steven got excited over a big ceramic chalice he found that looked fabulously demonic. But that wasn't what we came for.

Suddenly, the little creature came running out at us at full speed. I knocked his legs out from under him and after some wrestling we got him tied up with some handy duct tape. We found our crystal and then started the discussion of whether we should leave him and worse, what if there were more like him down there.

So we ended up taking him up top with us, then we knocked him out and cut his hands loose. That's all I remember. Don't know what we did with the crystal.

Yeah. Sick dreams.

GOTTA EAT!

On a normal day this would be a little feast but I can't taste any of it. :-(The fruit is kind of dry, especially the blueberries because they are old. Trying to use milk in my tea all day because it's at the end of its, "use by" date. And dumping half a carton of milk is like dumping cash down the drain.

I have a little Chinese soup leftover, two cans of soup and just a little bit of medicine left. I'm craving cookies and chocolate so I guess my body wants sugar. What's THAT all about? I want to take a shower with lots of steam but I'm too dizzy. Scooping two of the four cat boxes nearly killed me. I can only imagine what full smellovision would've been like!

By Monday I'll have to get out of bed and get to the store no matter what the doc says or find a minion with money. Being sick means no work which means no grocery money. Such a grand adventure!

LATINX DRAMATIX

I've got to take a break from Ingobernable for a bit. My eyes are too bleary for subtitles and I can only take so many Latino tv style long, dramatic, memory replay trope, scene breaks.

*gasp* Split second decision: should she shoot or should she run? Five minute montage of all the times he's saved her followed by two seconds of she shoots gun, blows shit up, saves him they run.

So, I'm probably gonna watch about twenty minutes of Bill Nye Saves the World before I fall asleep and have more weird sick dreams.

SCIENCE!

Boy oh boy. I know a lot of peeps who would be really peeved by Bill Nye's show on alternative medicine. And don't even get me started on your irrational fear of all GMOs, another episode worth watching!

I've been thinking a lot about this.

Either you come down on the side of science or you come down on the side of self indulgent foolishness. It's really hard to thoroughly believe in alternative medicine AND support science.

Now I believe some alternative therapies may have benefit either because of placebo effect or because they haven't been thoroughly scientifically tested. When I use something like small amounts of tumeric, I know it might help but that it also won't hurt me. When I hold a crystal I know that the benefit is probably psychological. I'm willing to admit it might be worthless.

But, I know many people who swear by something they "know" works merely by anecdote and who firmly believe all sorts of unscientific woo while proclaiming their support of science and wailing that our government is becoming anti-science.

Maybe it's time for some self examination. Can have it both ways? Are you part of the problem? Are you closer to the climate change deniers than you want to be?

Just thinkin'

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Still Sick. Doing My Best To Get Things Done!

4/20/2017

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THIS STORYTIME DESERVES AN OMFG!

SERIOUSLY; OMFG!

My last day to pay storage without a late fee was Tuesday, but the card they had on file wasn't valid anymore and I was too sick to go in person.

I called and talked to the manager, Regina. First, she offered to email me a new credit card form (which I today found out I would have had to print out and bring in anyway) but when I said I needed to deposit a check before I she could run the card anyway (and then had a coughing fit while on the phone) she got impatient and snapped, "Just come in Thursday and I'll waive the fee!"

So, I peeled myself out of bed and dragged myself over to Alameda today. I put a mask on just to be safe. The person working in the office, Cheryl, who is usually super nice, flipped out on me.

"Why did you come in sick? I have asthma. I can't afford to catch anything. Those masks don't work."

(I dunno, I have a hospital grade mask and I'm not coughing)

"Why didn't you just pay online with your card?" She rushes to open the door and she recoils across the desk from me.

I explained that I needed to fill out a new card form because the bank sent me a new card with a new number and so she shoved a form at me, standing while I fill it out as quickly as possible. Then she grabs my card to run the payment.

I also explain to her that Regina instructed me to come in today and that she would waive the late fee.

"Regina doesn't work on Thursdays!"

"Well, did she leave a note?"

"I didn't see anything. Let me check the computer. No there's nothing in here. You have to pay a late fee. I can't do anything."

"Can you call her?"

"No."

Well, why would she tell me to come in today and promise me she'd waive the fee and just dump this on you?"

"Well, it's not her fault."

"Oh. How's that?"

"Well, people try to lie their way out of late fees all the time so if there's no note..."

"Cheryl, I've had storage here for three years. Have I ever bitched about having to pay a late fee when I really had to pay it? No. I might ask, but you have no reason to make this up. I don't know why she had me come in today and didn't tell you but I'm not paying that late fee."

"Fine. Fine. I just want you out of here before I get sick!"

She credits back the damn late fee.

This is one of many times I have gotten conflicting stories from staff at Alameda Point Storage. Regina can be super sweet but she's also pulled power trips and I've caught her in a number of lies. I cannot wait until I finally live somewhere where I can have all my belongings instead of paying out all this money and being at the mercy of other people's whims.

Ridiculous!

COMFORT!

Being sick when you are poor is expensive! When, OTC meds, prescription copays, cough drops, tissue, etc, is not in your budget, neither is food. Unfortunately, I'm also too sick to prep my own food and i don't have a microwave. I have subsisted on canned soups that aren't cheap enough, and occasionally take out.

Tuesday night I stocked up on Hot and Sour Soup, spicy string beans and pork noodle soup from Yang Chow. If I hadn't, I would not have eaten at all. In lieu of groceries, it is money well spent. Today, I stopped at Monkey Thai in Alameda on my way home for a cheap but comfort laden Pad Thai combo plate. It's cheap and will last three meals. They remodeled. It looks like a real restaurant now. Nice!

Now home to bed.

If I can't cook for myself I'll take this yummy comfort food for the win! Pad Thai with tofu, extra peanuts and extra peanut sauce. So good, even with my limited senses of smell and taste.

Now back to ordered bed rest with THE KITTY and binging The Blacklist.

I really binged on the Pad Thai. It was so good! I ate more in one sitting than I have in the past two weeks combined!

I AM SUCH A CURMUDGEON
(AND NOT JUST BECAUSE I AM SICK) WHEN IT COMES TO FAKE NEWS.
IT TAKES LITTLE EFFORT TO CHECK BEFORE SHARING!
THIS ONE WON'T DIE!

I mean, come on; my friends aren't THIS stupid! Or are they?

Perhaps gullible and lazy are better words?

AN IMPORTANT PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:

If you are too lazy to spend three seconds doing a Google or Snopes search or a list of the most likely sources of fake news/pseudoscience sites, here's a tip:

If it's some sort of shocking news
Miracle cure
A thing "THEY don't want you to know"
If it mentions GMO
If it's anything about BEES

THEN, IT'S PROBABLY FAKE NEWS! 99.9% LIKELIHOOD!

Don't be an annoyingly gullible fake news spreader. It just makes you look stupid. Thanks.

And honestly, this kind of thinking without investigating or any degree of critical application, like saying all GMO is "horrible"and not discerning the difference between GMO science which is neutral and the giant corporations like Monsanto that have been irresponsible with some GMO products because all they care about is profit! Good grief! This blind belief is why Trump got elected and continues to get away with lie after lie.

Many of the same people who spread fake news like this are flabbergasted that people believe Trump. Wake up and THINK people!

Question ALL the things!

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Trying To Breathe

Stay tuned for reason #572 why my new therapist is awesome sauce!

Sick & Miserable but Getting By With A Little Help From My Friends

I NEED THE DRUGS!

SCIENCE!!!

CATS

Sick, But Friends To The Rescue!

When People Can Send Me Drugs Via Amazon.....

Dear Past Lorelei: We miss that loud fuzzball

Sick Day: Netflix and Weird Dreams

DOCTOR'S ORDERS

WHAT'S ON TV?

That moment when you wake up and your lungs are blissfully calm ...
UNTIL
you sit up and cough for ten fecking minutes! Waah.

FEVER DREAMS

GOTTA EAT!

LATINX DRAMATIX

SCIENCE!

Still Sick. Doing My Best To Get Things Done!

THIS STORYTIME DESERVES AN OMFG!

COMFORT!

I AM SUCH A CURMUDGEON
(AND NOT JUST BECAUSE I AM SICK) WHEN IT COMES TO FAKE NEWS.
IT TAKES LITTLE EFFORT TO CHECK BEFORE SHARING!
THIS ONE WON'T DIE!

Author

Archives

Categories

Trying To Breathe

​Stay tuned for reason #572 why my new therapist is awesome sauce!

Sick & Miserable but Getting By With A Little Help From My Friends

I NEED THE DRUGS!

SCIENCE!!!

CATS

Sick, But Friends To The Rescue!

When People Can Send Me Drugs Via Amazon.....

Dear Past Lorelei: We miss that loud fuzzball

Sick Day: Netflix and Weird Dreams

DOCTOR'S ORDERS

WHAT'S ON TV?

​That moment when you wake up and your lungs are blissfully calm ... UNTIL ​you sit up and cough for ten fecking minutes! Waah.

FEVER DREAMS

GOTTA EAT!

LATINX DRAMATIX

SCIENCE!

Still Sick. Doing My Best To Get Things Done!

THIS STORYTIME DESERVES AN OMFG!

COMFORT!

I AM SUCH A CURMUDGEON (AND NOT JUST BECAUSE I AM SICK) WHEN IT COMES TO FAKE NEWS. IT TAKES LITTLE EFFORT TO CHECK BEFORE SHARING! ​THIS ONE WON'T DIE!

Author

Archives

Categories

Stay tuned for reason #572 why my new therapist is awesome sauce!

That moment when you wake up and your lungs are blissfully calm ...
UNTIL
you sit up and cough for ten fecking minutes! Waah.

I AM SUCH A CURMUDGEON
(AND NOT JUST BECAUSE I AM SICK) WHEN IT COMES TO FAKE NEWS.
IT TAKES LITTLE EFFORT TO CHECK BEFORE SHARING!
THIS ONE WON'T DIE!